Wayne Rooney today rallied the England team for tomorrow’s World Cup Qualifier against minnows Malta by declaring “whatever Scotland can do, we can do ten times better!”

Scotland beat England’s opponents 5-1 in Malta last time out, in the Group F opening qualifiers, whilst England scrapped to an extra time 1-0 win against Slovakia.

When challenged in today’s press conference, that on Rooney’s math; England would need to win by a fifty (50) goal margin, Captain Rooney seemed in confident mood stating;

“Malta…. It’s a bit of a teaser… I’ve heard their floaty light in defence! More holes than a nestle chocolate bubble!”

He then went on to declare:

“Since Gareth’s come in there’s a really positive mood in the camp and we’ve been trying some new things to take advantage of our offensive talent, working around mainly me – obviously.”

In bullyish mood he continued:

“Didn’t Snodgrass get a hat trick against ’em last game? I’ll eat my hat (or should that be cap!), if I don’t get at least ten (10) alone in this match.”

Our exclusive CRB-VIP reporter then fired a final question asking; “But Wayne, on current form, do you think you’ll start tomorrow’s fixture?

Rooney declined to comment….

Start or not, if the team and new interim coach Gareth Southgate share Rooney’s optimism, we should be in for a goal fest.

Go get ’em England!




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